Tuesday, July 27, 2010

Adrenaline. (Prom Night Poem)

Once; Twice; Three times.
Black hair; Olive skin; Lithe body.
Easy charm; Laughing eyes ; Sexual heat.
I searched for words to explain,
Why my heat raced more than my legs,
Why the sun isn't in your eyes,
And the moon hidden in your dimples.

Images appear and merge
One with another
These images are my dreams
These images were my future
These images are my nightmare,
These images are you.
My vision dims,
Shadows closing in,
As my eyes go sleepy,....

Morning sun; Eye bags
I feel a scream make its way up my throat
But all I can manage to get out is the image of you,
Not a scream,not a word,
Passion or Obsession?
Just adrenaline.
I see shadows;
Long shadows;
Small ones;Thoughts of you-
Accelerating my heart beat..

I miss my nightmare.
For that is the only place i could dance with you,
Passion or obsession.
No rythm to your waist,
Not one sight of imperfection,
The rush of blood,
The speed of my heart beat,
Must be Adrenaline.

I am without roots
Broken and incomplete
Wasting away.
Im blown away by your presence,
Physics, Chemistry. Explain Adrenaline.
Every attempt lessens me
I am less than I am
Less than I can be
Searching in vain
For someone to fill me.
Not with laughter,
Not with dreams without nightmares,
But with Adrenaline,
When your lips knocks at mine.

On prom night,
I took her away,
I didn't kill her,
I didnt know for what reason
Left her to the mercies of hunger for hours;
My starving passion,
Engraved obsession;
Then we danced with no music,
I didn't feel the passion,..
Just Adrenaline.
I loved your attention.
I craved your attention.
I fed on your attention.

Saturday, July 24, 2010

The Traffic in The Tunnel.

I never thought I'll be late for Adanne's baby dedication,considering the fact that this is her first male issue,after 5girls and 3 lost issues! I should be there to break the kola; to say the opening prayer,to prove to her yoruba mother in law that the fact that their wombs are tired by their mothers,until they get married,doesn't mean that we igbos,that ours are untempered,with go about misusing it! I wanted to be there for everything but only to hear her pronounce the name,the walk of tears on her cheek and the brilliant resistance to kneel down and weep while she says ''CHINURUOKPUANYI SAMUEL OLUWAPELUMI ADEBISI' She wold look beautiful no doubt. My sister has always looked radiant even i her times of trials. Now God has blessed Her,she would tie her head gear in the yoruba way..the 4ft plus method.She would smile at wrong doings and forgive her husband if he gets drunk.I wanted to take some cartoons of red bull too,but for the traffic in the tunnel.

I was already getting angry and frustrated,all because of the traffic in the tunnel. I did not mind using okadas,but it seemed to me that okada riders also dreaded the tunnels. I wind down to inhale the fresh air,the mixture of purified dust from a distance outside of the traffic in the tunnel and flames from the women roasting corn and plantain! It didn't seem so fresh and cleared up as i thought,so i quickly wind up and increased the volume of the radio! I thought about Allison. I thought about our 3kids. I pictured life without 4 of them,the space on the mattress each night,nobody to run and embrace me so tightly,when i get back from work. I thought of my plans to meet my lawyer,whose office is seated 4buildings after Mr.BIGGS,just outside the traffic in the tunnel.

I should be doing the right thing. Allison told me that she got kissed by her boss! What kind of woman,married i must say,get kissed while at work. She cried when she told me. She was holding unto my leg when i told her its over! This cant work anymore. I love Allison,she is the one that makes me smile while amidst depression! She knows i am right even when I'm wrong. How could she kiss him? Did she think of the times we shared together...both of us,just us,doing us and making us! I kiss her each time and i taste love.'she is me and me is she'...I remember clearly that was our vow...the one we took in the church. We promised forever and always. She betrayed me! she must quit her job,at least to show remorse. I will call her to tel her to resign first thing on Monday,but that will be when i will recharge my phone,after the traffic in the tunnel.

I haven't eaten since she told me,I love Allison. She made me believe in love. She made me understand,that love can come along,just when we least expect it to,and turn an ordinary life,into something sweet and new. I came out of my car,to look at how long the traffic in the tunnel was. I thought if adanne's program Has entered the item seven. I wondered how delicious and well fried,her meat will be. She is a perfection in the kitchen,So is Allison. I looked to buy something to eat,while i lingered in the traffic in the tunnel.

Allison once told me that love can light a candle,where the sadness used to be,and heal the broken parts of us with trust and honesty.That should be why she told me about Him! she was being honest and following The commitment of her words. I believe love can give us wings to fly,above the world we know and lead us on adventures,where we never dreamed we'd go. I remembered Allison,How she tries to make everything work each time we hit our backs. That is wat marriage was about,isn't? she told me,every single time we quarrel. she told me love can lift us to our feet,and teach us how to dance and dare us to believe again and take another chance. I should take another chance with Allison. I cant live without her.Even when i try so hard,all i think of is the puzzle on her chin,which makes it difficult for one to predict when she is sad,depressed or just being Allison,the love of chikwendu's life. I will Give this another chance,but she would not know that i miss her like a breathe. I'll let her know that we are doing it for the children.But i cant see her now,or talk to her,and tell her 'lets give it another chance' and when we hug each other,i will cry at her back,and know that thinking of her,made me survive a long traffic in the tunnel.

Allison called me,just when we moved a distance in the traffic in the tunnel,and told me she has resigned from work and is willing to be a stay at home mom,if that is what it takes to keep her all to myself. I told Allison that we will try to make it work for the kids. She said I love you and that if we cannot fly in this marriage,we would run; if we cannot run,we would walk; If we cannot walk,we would crawl;But we Must keep moving. I cried because I love Allison. I decided we would move in this marriage,but right now,I'm in the traffic in the tunnel!!

Friday, July 23, 2010

I Hallucinate.

My skin is riddled with goosebumps,
My teeth clatter,
My head swims in a dark world.
My eyes are drained from tears.
A robber with no weapon?
Do you drink blood?
Slay my heart on a butchers board,
Dried blood; Big flies buzz.
Don't kill my soul,
Take my body.
Feast on my joys,
But let me dream.
Let me dream of a land full of robbers who pay tithe,
Let me dream,
Let me see a land
If with nobody,
Let me see a land my child would live.

My soul races without my leg,
My legs are weak from the journey of life,
It bares patches from stale dust,.
I search for wisdom,
Yet i see the wise, Being foolish.
I want to be rich,
I want to buy cars but drive none,
If I demand, may it only be of myself!
Riches are given for the ransom of your life.
Take my happiness,Give me wealth!

I felt the rain drizzle,
Soon it soaks my heavy heart.
I cried it out;
The joy I felt no more,
I've killed my lover!
I run to my mother's village,
The world hates me now,
Two white buds in my nose;
That's how they see me
But she uses her wrapper to wipe my dirty feet.
If i clench my fist,
May it only be in prayers,
My gaze is on the world,
Tomorrow is pregnant!

The world is still asleep,
The sky is black,
The day is coming,
It will roar down the track,
With the rising sun,
The stillness of dawn will be exchanged for the noise of the day.
The calm solitude will be replaced by the pounding pace of the human race.
The day works by,
People die; People are born
The green earth is being polluted,
Global warming; Recycling disaster.
I see a black man turn off his light bulb?
Oh! I'm blind; I don't see!

If i dream,I live,
If i raise my voice,I praise.
If it drizzles; It has rained!
If there's today; Tomorrow is pregnant!